I still remember creating my Facebook account during my sophomore year of college. It was a timely and convenient way to make new friends and keep up with an increasingly distributed social circle. In the intervening years, Twitter became an indispensable way of keeping up with global news and trends, and Instagram served as a… Continue reading Stilling the Waters: How Quitting Social Media Saved My Life
“Crying is cleansing. There’s a reason for tears, happiness or sadness.” —Dionne Warwick Get over it. Suck it up. I don’t want to hear it. Dry em up. What are you crying for? As an African American male I’ve heard all of these. Whether from my own family, friends, television or movies, it always struck… Continue reading Tears and Black Masculinity
unlearning is a part of the journey. relearning is a part of the blessing. —alex elle Note to Readers: I’ve been praying through journaling this past year. I have a massive document filled with prayers about many things—mainly faith, love, relationships, and purpose—and I want to share a few with you. This is deeply personal… Continue reading Learning to Float
A few weeks ago, I stepped away from the kinky/curly hair community for a basic haircut. I’d re-entered the space with an understanding of how I revel in the fragmentation of the African-American community. While I question what it means to be united with other African-Americans, I used my hair to play up my self-worth.… Continue reading Searching For Identity In the Realm of Black Hair
Deciding to go into therapy is a choice that often comes as a last resort. For black men, we avoid it until it becomes a self-imposed ultimatum. In my case, it was a desire. I wanted to talk to someone who held no judgement of my past. I wanted to confide in someone who held… Continue reading Therapy Changed Everything
As fall sets in across North America, I have noticed something most profound. After more than 20 years as a professional in the outdoor recreation industry, I’ve begun to see more people of color than ever before venturing out into the natural world. This is, of course, an anecdotal observation not based on numbers. But the… Continue reading Closing the Adventure Gap
It took me a long time to figure out that my love wasn’t potent enough to be an antidote to that disease. In fact, even if the cure for that disease could have been detected within my love, the years spent responding to misdiagnosed symptoms proved to be fatal. The time spent improperly responding to… Continue reading Love and Affliction
Fat faggot was what they called me from eighth through twelfth grades. It had been just plain faggot before then. And sissy and sweet thang and Oreo and mutt and sometimes halfbreed and once or twice even cracker. But it was fat faggot that stayed. It stayed after I had graduated high school and lost… Continue reading Brothers, Do You Love Yourselves?